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What Makes a Good, or Bad, Therapist

April 3, 2008

Well, it takes all kinds…all kinds of people in all walks of life…to make up this world. Some are very self centered. Some are very other centered. I wish I could say that I am always among the other centered type…but I am not. I can be just as selfish as anyone else.

Among those who are here to help others…there are both good and bad. Some are bad because they are just inept…or because they simply need more training and/or experience. Some are bad because they are just plain self centered and are not really all that interested in helping others unless it somehow gives them something back. Some are bad because it is in their nature…they actually want to hurt others. In other words, they are intentional perpetrators.

I have had some really good therapists. I have also run into some bad ones. The good ones did not all have the same experience and/or training. Yet, their heart motivations and true desire to help others outweighed whatever they lacked in other areas. Another important thing, for me, is that they prayed for their clients and asked God for wisdom.

Even the local therapist I have now has no prior experience working with a client who has been through SRA or who is dissociative. Yet…he listens…and he really cares. He also prays for wisdom. His motivation is to genuinely help. When I need info on the SRA stuff, I can call my CA therapist.

She is another one who is wonderful. She has a heart of gold and lots of experience in my area of abuse. I can call her and send her things to read. She has helped me so much, even after we relocated.

The therapist I saw before her was also really helpful…probably helped save my life when I had no clue what was going on. He really cared. He helped me to the extent of his knowledge, but having no real experience working with SRA survivors, I eventually needed to switch over to one of his colleagues.

There have been a couple of others from many years before them who also really cared. I needed them for a time and then moved on. This is the longest I have stayed in therapy; but then, I am also working through much tougher stuff this time.

A good therapist is one who really cares and who is humble…not full of him/herself. Good ones are willing to admit they do NOT know it all and do NOT have all the answers. Good ones are willing to work to find the answers, though, and are teachable. They listen to us, the client. They don’t just tell us what to do and how to do it. They help us to discover the answers and listen to what we think needs to be worked on. In other words, they don’t right us off as being stupid or dumb or ignorant. They give us credit for working on our own healing.

Another criteria that is important for me is that they be solid, for real followers of Yeshua/Jesus. I want all of my healing done under the guidance of the Holy Spirit. It is He that I want to lead both my therapist and me on this healing journey. I am not saying that other therapists are bad…only that they are not suitable for me. The fact that a therapist calls him/herself “Christian” is no guarantee that they are a good therapist, either. I ran into a local “Christian” therapist who was cult connected. It was NOT good!

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