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Art, Art, Art…and Tears…

January 3, 2011

I have been adding more of my art to my art blog.

In between, I was listening to a teaching by a pastor acquaintance of mine named Glen. As usual, it brought tears to my eyes. He and another leader (Jim) are some of the few people I know who really seem to love unconditionally. Actually, I think all the leaders there do.

Glen and Jim accept DID and one of them had even interacted with a multiple prior to meeting me. They are not experts or anything, but they care and they love. Jim has really helped me a lot. I met them both at an online seminar given by Christian in Recovery. If we lived in Phoenix, we would be attending their congregation in a heartbeat.

I have also had the privilege of helping to proofread/edit a book Glen and Jim co-wrote. They have amazing insights into the word of G-d and how things are supposed to be, but tend to not be. Their congregation is set up like no other I know of. It is not your traditional meeting. So, when I listen, I tend to cry because I wish I was able to be there…to be a part of what they are doing. Every time I hear one of their teachings I am reminded of the body ministry that is so lacking in most of our “church” experiences.

I am probably rambling right now. I am not up to trying to write a “polished” post. This is a time of struggle. Things are pressing in upon me and I am tired. I keep looking forward to getting out of this tiny place. I want to have the freedom to go to bed when I please and get up when I please. I want to be laying where the heater is not blowing directly upon me…causing me to wake up at night because it keeps sticking on. I want to be able to get up and get my body moving without needing to be concerned about someone “camping” in the only bathroom we have. I want a lot of things and I try not to be ungrateful for what we have. After all, we could be on the street.

We just went through a couple of days of having on and off water. We had a leak, then a broken pipe and then the water hose froze. Things are breaking down in here and not all of them are simple to fix. We need to get out of here…soon. We are hoping by the end of the month, but I don’t know.

I could write more, but it would probably sound like a whine party. All I need is some cheese and bread to go with it. (That was a lousy attempt at humor.) I have to say that, if I did not know who I am in the Creator, I would give up. Quite frankly, He is the reason I am alive. He is the reason I have any sanity left at all…although some may question whether or not I really have some. Oh, well. Such is life, right?

I wish everyone well. Keep your head and heart up. There are better things to come…even if it does not seem like it right now.

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