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Learning to breathe through the tears…

March 2, 2013

The tears come and the tears come. Ha…you thought I would say “come” and “go”, didn’t you? Well, that would be partially true, I guess. But the times when the tears are not literally there, they are still there in my heart. So, yeah, the tears come (outside) and the tears come (inside). They never really seem to go completely away. They are ever ready on the inside to spring to the outer world.

I feel as if I am fighting the darkness and I am walking through mud. I push to get up. I push to get through my day. I think of my son, of my daughter-in-love, of my granddaughter, of my other grandchildren, of my other children, of all who are suffering. Every family member is in shock. No one expected this.

There are a lot of things that you can believe might happen in your family…but not this. Somehow, you just don’t think it will ever happen to YOUR family.

I know that we will “adapt”, but the idea of joyful thriving seems very far away right now…very far away.

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